Endorphin. Release.

Run. Just run.

Keep moving. Nothing in between.

Exactly a year ago today at 6:00PM, I went under the knife. Something I did not want, laminectomy due to herniated disc at L4, L5. I was made to believe that it’s something I needed. Only after the surgery that I knew that my decision to be in unison with my surgeon’s call to finally open my back is to become the most important in my first 31 years and soon after most regretful but hopefully not straight through to the next 31 years. When I made the decision, never did I know that any surgery relating to the spine is so critical that it may change your life, be it during the surgery itself or soon after the operation is done. I must say, I am strong to have survived the 8-hour procedure which should have only been for 4 hours maximum according to the surgeon.

And the whole gamut.

Difficult as it is, I choose not to scribe my way to recovery. I’ve been through a lot and I chose not to go through them again. And I am for certain, the whole experience is by far the greatest lesson. That if I were to come across people who would be faced with the same situation to consider surgery as a means to get well, I would ask them to work with a less aggressive medical practitioner first. Someone who is conservative and would put them on medication and physical therapy first. Overtime, if nothing progresses, then maybe take the route to surgery. Again, not as the first option.

I’m no expert in human anatomy or medicine in general but since the 10th of February in 2012, I have since realized that your body has limits. That if you go beyond the limits, you will have to pay back.

Listen to what your body is saying. Trust even what your body is not saying. There’s only you and your body, nothing comes in between.

 

2012 in review

The WordPress.com stats helper monkeys prepared a 2012 annual report for this blog.

Here’s an excerpt:

600 people reached the top of Mt. Everest in 2012. This blog got about 10,000 views in 2012. If every person who reached the top of Mt. Everest viewed this blog, it would have taken 17 years to get that many views.

Click here to see the complete report.

Give up tomorrow

It’s been 10 months since I last had laminectomy done in my back. It’s been that long since I last had a jog at the park.

It’s been 4 months since I last posted a blog. It’s been that long since I have not shared my thoughts and feelings.

Now I’m back again. Perhaps to experience the saddest Christmas since I’ve come to realize what it’s worth.

Earlier today, my doctor dropped the bomb. His diagnosis was right.

Dextroscoliosis of the upper thoracic vertebrae. Give up tomorrow.

No matter how joyous I get each time I do things I love, I just need to give up on some for a greater cause.